Here we are getting a bit better. More engaging. Better tone. Much shorter. Better first line, though I have ideas on how to make it even better. This isn't perfect, but it is a leap forward. In this one I feel there is a possibility the reader will believe I can write.
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Swan Shreve thinks her former middle school secretary has lost her marbles. It's been fifteen years since the last time she saw the old bat and now Mrs. Hamel shows up out of nowhere, announces she's actually a spy for a top secret government secretarial pool, and says she needs Swan's help. Even if it were real, Swan isn't interested. She just got her Ph.D. in English and working as a secretary to an upper level engineer in a weapons company is only temporary until she can find a tenure track position teahching the importance of Aphra Behn to sleeping freshmen. But Mrs. Hamel has more of her marbles (and various other weapons) than Swan realizes. The Strategic Secretarial Services (SSS) is real and when a coworker is murder and the killers come after Swan, she'll need every bit of Mrs. Hamel's help to stay alive.
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1 comment:
I like this one. It's quite a bit better than the previous two!
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